When I was in 8th grade I ran for student council president of my middle school. My family didn't own a printer so I wrote out hundreds of "Vote for Maggie!" stickers with colored Sharpies.
And my launch was better than DeSantis' launch. And, not to brag, but I had the 3rd and 4th grade vote on lock because they all knew me as a crossing guard for the safety patrol.
When I was in 8th grade I ran for student council president of my middle school. My family didn't own a printer so I wrote out hundreds of "Vote for Maggie!" stickers with colored Sharpies.
And my launch was better than DeSantis' launch. And, not to brag, but I had the 3rd and 4th grade vote on lock because they all knew me as a crossing guard for the safety patrol.
I'm not old enough to run in '24! But I just came up with a great theme I think the white, high-school educated, aging Republican base voters can really get behind. It encompasses everything they love in both politicians and women!
I was for a fall/winter semester a crossing guard in elementary school too. When the rotating "whistle captain" (the signal for the sign-holding guards to hold out the stop signs) rolled around to me I got great pleasure tormenting the students by refusing to blow the signal until a fairly large mass of kids had assembled and were yelling "C.mon, man. Blow it already!!" I never had any youthful political ambitions, but given the reputation I had earned as being a dick I'm pretty sure any campaign I might have considered would have died in the cradle.
I have this image of you campaigning in your safety vest right alongside Ron and his white boots.
And as far as it goes, I have to assume it is that age old dilemma, can't win the 3rd and 4th without being a crossing guard, can't win the 5th-8th being a crossing guard.
So true! So I just promised the 5th-8th graders something they wanted that I couldn't possibly deliver: new fiberglass backboards in the gymnasium. That was my equivalent of "cut taxes and reduce the deficit".
In my defense, A. every candidate promised new fiberglass backboards and B. I thought I actually could do it.
But once I won, I realized I was just part of a puppet regime with no real power.
This actually led me to google the school. At some point they remodeled the whole gym, including not 2 but 4 fiberglass backboards, so I can sleep easy tonight knowing eventually the people got what they wanted (albeit probably a decade to late to enjoy it.
Two of the major contenders for the GOP presidential primary are two of the worst candidates put forward. One, announced yesterday on Twitter and imploded on lift-off. The other has a court date March 24, 2024 right in the middle of primary season that is non-negotiable. This is the best the GOP has to offer. I'll take my chances with Dark Brandon.
RIP- Tina Turner. Your music was part of the soundtrack to my college life.
I truly hope that the term "Costanza defense" is a meme that will survive through adaptation as cultural evolution proceeds. Thank you for giving it legs!
Just looked up "the Costanza Defense" and one of the examples was when George Costanza said, "It's not a lie if you believe it." Another example was when his boss confronted him with a report that he had had sex on his desk with the cleaning woman, and he said, "I claim ignorance" because nobody told me when he started the job that that wasn't allowed.
Sounds like the sleazy attempts Trump's lawyers try to defend him
My recollection of that scene of George's boss confronting George about his having sex with the cleaning lady was George's playing the innocent role, saying, "Was that wrong?" You had to laugh at George's audacity.
I was thinking of the first one, but the second one is pretty good too. Reminds me of Bill Maher's reference to Gus. I haven't watched in quite a while, but he used to liken some of the republican shenanigans to the movie Gus, in which some team got a donkey (or something) to kick field goals because nowhere in the rules did it explicitly state that you couldn't have a donkey on a team.
Exactly! It's a term that means the defense is so illogical, so inane, so well, "Trumpy," that the only response it deserves is our inordinate laughter!
When I was in 8th grade I ran for student council president of my middle school. My family didn't own a printer so I wrote out hundreds of "Vote for Maggie!" stickers with colored Sharpies.
And my launch was better than DeSantis' launch. And, not to brag, but I had the 3rd and 4th grade vote on lock because they all knew me as a crossing guard for the safety patrol.
You Go Girl! Retail Politics at it's core! Simple, yet Effective!
Maggie for President!
Maybe you could give him some advice.
Maggie,
You made their lives a little bit safer and better. That is already two BIG steps ahead of DeSantisтАЩ approach to governing!!
Tom Cannon
Asheville, NC
RIGGED. Using the awesome power of the crossing guard to further your political career is almost as disgraceful as the fact I never of thought of it.
Maggie '24: You Could Obviously Do Worse(tm)
I'm not old enough to run in '24! But I just came up with a great theme I think the white, high-school educated, aging Republican base voters can really get behind. It encompasses everything they love in both politicians and women!
Maggie '28: Barely Legal.
I'm gonna start a super pac.
You win the internet today. This alone is comedy gold. Coupled with the crossing guard stuff before....chef's kiss.
I was for a fall/winter semester a crossing guard in elementary school too. When the rotating "whistle captain" (the signal for the sign-holding guards to hold out the stop signs) rolled around to me I got great pleasure tormenting the students by refusing to blow the signal until a fairly large mass of kids had assembled and were yelling "C.mon, man. Blow it already!!" I never had any youthful political ambitions, but given the reputation I had earned as being a dick I'm pretty sure any campaign I might have considered would have died in the cradle.
I have this image of you campaigning in your safety vest right alongside Ron and his white boots.
And as far as it goes, I have to assume it is that age old dilemma, can't win the 3rd and 4th without being a crossing guard, can't win the 5th-8th being a crossing guard.
So true! So I just promised the 5th-8th graders something they wanted that I couldn't possibly deliver: new fiberglass backboards in the gymnasium. That was my equivalent of "cut taxes and reduce the deficit".
In my defense, A. every candidate promised new fiberglass backboards and B. I thought I actually could do it.
But once I won, I realized I was just part of a puppet regime with no real power.
This actually led me to google the school. At some point they remodeled the whole gym, including not 2 but 4 fiberglass backboards, so I can sleep easy tonight knowing eventually the people got what they wanted (albeit probably a decade to late to enjoy it.
Congratulations on your winning presidential campaign! I think (hope) that it is one more winning presidential campaign than Meatball Ron.
Two of the major contenders for the GOP presidential primary are two of the worst candidates put forward. One, announced yesterday on Twitter and imploded on lift-off. The other has a court date March 24, 2024 right in the middle of primary season that is non-negotiable. This is the best the GOP has to offer. I'll take my chances with Dark Brandon.
RIP- Tina Turner. Your music was part of the soundtrack to my college life.
"I thought I actually could do it."
Costanza defense.
"I can sleep easy tonight knowing eventually the people got what they wanted"
I understand that the Italian trains are very punctual these days too. ;)
I truly hope that the term "Costanza defense" is a meme that will survive through adaptation as cultural evolution proceeds. Thank you for giving it legs!
Just looked up "the Costanza Defense" and one of the examples was when George Costanza said, "It's not a lie if you believe it." Another example was when his boss confronted him with a report that he had had sex on his desk with the cleaning woman, and he said, "I claim ignorance" because nobody told me when he started the job that that wasn't allowed.
Sounds like the sleazy attempts Trump's lawyers try to defend him
My recollection of that scene of George's boss confronting George about his having sex with the cleaning lady was George's playing the innocent role, saying, "Was that wrong?" You had to laugh at George's audacity.
I was thinking of the first one, but the second one is pretty good too. Reminds me of Bill Maher's reference to Gus. I haven't watched in quite a while, but he used to liken some of the republican shenanigans to the movie Gus, in which some team got a donkey (or something) to kick field goals because nowhere in the rules did it explicitly state that you couldn't have a donkey on a team.
lol... saw this in the movies as a kid. Gus was a Mule..
Exactly! It's a term that means the defense is so illogical, so inane, so well, "Trumpy," that the only response it deserves is our inordinate laughter!