63 Comments
User's avatar
тна Return to thread
Mike Lew's avatar

What an odd coincidence. Last night, I convened a People's Court and found 45 guilty of multiple felonies. We have an appropriate cell prepared in Ned's basement. We get to enact a citizens' arrest now. Surely Larry Klayman will back me up on this. Right?

Expand full comment
Nancy (South NJ coast)'s avatar

Problem is, violent sovereign-citizen and local-authority extremists are out there and they believe stuff like Klayman's. Remember Ruby Ridge? The maga congressman representing my district sits on Jim Jordan's replica of the Judiciary Committee. Jeff Van Drew's current constituent newsletter touts his commitment to an impeachment investigation of Joe Biden. What happens in Idaho doesn't necessarily stay in Idaho once it leaches into the magaverse.

Expand full comment
Maggie's avatar

Can we take a minute to talk about the right embracing "The People's Anything"

Should someone tell them they sound like a bund of godless commies?

I'm concerned that before we know it "The People's Republic of Florida" is going start collectivizing it's citrus groves.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Is Anita Bryant available to be the orange grove commissar?

Expand full comment
R Mercer's avatar

Is Anita Bryant still alive? I am sometimes surprised these days by obituaries of people I thought long dead.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

According to Wikipedia, she's 83 and alive. Also according to Wikipedia, her granddaughter recently came out. I suspect that won't change the hate that she's based her life on.

Expand full comment
R Mercer's avatar

Karma is a bitch.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I guess I just don't understand it. Everytime I've held onto a grudge or hated someone, it hurt me more than them. It actively ruins your life to hold onto hate. Why ruin your life worry about who other people can love? Madness!

Expand full comment
R Mercer's avatar

I feel you.

I am not sure that there is really anything to understand, in the sense that there is a logical rationale involved. It is an aspect of human nature (identity).

You cannot understand why they care about such things. They cannot understand why you don't.

We have plenty of aphorisms/sayings about these things that people do not pay attention to. An entire philosophy built around it (stoicism)... so there is a recognition of the problem at some level.

Expand full comment
Rita Parker's avatar

Bravo, Mike!

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I have a particularly tedious task at work today. The frequent brain breaks are keeping me from running down the hall screaming!

Expand full comment
User's avatar
Comment deleted
Aug 30, 2023
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I'm just about through the rough part. Time to knuckle down and crank a report out. Thanks for playing along. :)

Expand full comment
Robert Jaffee's avatar

I wonder who was on the jury? Could it be Clive Bundy and his тАЬkey-stoneтАЭ militia? Just asking for a friend!...:)

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

If we can get the printer ink cartridge fiasco resolved, minutes of our deliberations and all the jurors names will be published. You'd think Staples could keep this in stock for important judicial proceedings!

Expand full comment
Deutschmeister's avatar

Imagine the possibilities as the loons fantasize about an ad hoc People's Court for every perceived grievance and injustice that they seek to overturn. Students holding professors liable and punishable for giving them bad grades in classes when they failed to study and do the required work? Store owners jailed for selling legal products and services that are deemed offensive to someone's sensitivities? So many possibilities ... be sure to tell the mob about the tax hikes they will endure at the cost of building those super-sized jails to house almost every member of the public who ever did someone else wrong, real or perceived, at any time.

Expand full comment
Eastern Promises's avatar

Imagine "The Dark Knight Rises", except without the good looking and talented actors. I am pretty sure that is exactly what many of these yahoos have in mind.

Expand full comment
Robert Jaffee's avatar

тАЬStore owners jailed for selling legal products and services that are deemed offensive to someone's sensitivities?тАЭ

Or store owners being gunned for displaying a sign you find offensive; like the store owner in San Francisco who was gunned down for displaying a pride sign. ItтАЩs not just the fake justice, itтАЩs people taking their perceived justice into their own hands; no fake trial necessary!

Your dystopian future is already here, we just refuse to acknowledge it...:)

Expand full comment
Dan-o's avatar

George Carlin had a great idea about two decades ago. And I apologize to the good citizens of the below mentioned states now in advance. George said we should fence off Colorado, New Mexico, Arizona and Utah with very tall impregnable fences with barbed wire. We gather all the loonies together and place them in theses states. We can divide them up in the individual states however we like. Let them do whatever they want. Once a year, we open the gates at the corners where they come together for a day, maybe a week, just so they can mingle.

He was thinking about convicted felons, I believe. It was funny when he did it.

Expand full comment
User's avatar
Comment removed
Aug 30, 2023
Comment removed
Expand full comment
SB in Derby City's avatar

Near Lake Arrowhead. ItтАЩs a great area. Besides Arrowhead, Big Bear Lake is nearby. Area used to be a mecca for kids summer camps. Yes, SB in Derby City is a native southern Californian who moved to KY as a little boyтАжbut got to spend summers southern CA.

Expand full comment
Walternate ЁЯЗ║ЁЯЗжЁЯЗиЁЯЗжЁЯЗкЁЯЗ║ЁЯЗ╣ЁЯЗ╝ЁЯЗйЁЯЗ░ЁЯЗмЁЯЗ▒ЁЯЗ▓ЁЯЗ╜ЁЯЗ╡ЁЯЗж's avatar

Just wait until The Citizen's Courts starts trying each other for unlawful citizen's arrests and "phony" trials as opposing groups of the Citizen Law Enforcement and Citizen Judiciary communities begin turning on each other.

"You're under arrest for {something not really a crime, but I don't like}!"

"I don't recognize your authority! You're under arrest for arresting me!"

And so on...

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

That's exactly where this leads.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I'm having a great time crafting the tale of the ad hoc judicial system in my neighbor's basement. In real life, it'd be a horror as bad as you describe.

Expand full comment
User's avatar
Comment deleted
Aug 30, 2023
Comment deleted
Expand full comment
Eastern Promises's avatar

You left out a sentence:

Dean: Do it or you are fired.

Expand full comment
Carolyn Phipps's avatar

Thank you for your service.

Expand full comment
Kate Fall's avatar

The best part of that story was the quote: Joe was also busted for тАЬendless greed and corruption..." Endless greed is a crime now?! Excuse me, I have a few hundred subpoenas to hand write.

Expand full comment
R Mercer's avatar

Only a few hundred?

Expand full comment
Maggie's avatar

Does everyone who wore a suit in the 80s have to go to jail now?!?

Expand full comment
zedsdead's avatar

I wore Acid washed jeans and drove an IROC. Do I apply ?

Expand full comment
Robert Jaffee's avatar

Hey I resemble that remark!....:)

Expand full comment
Kate Fall's avatar

Yes, I went to high school on Long Island in the 80s, where I was assured repeatedly that "greed is good." What a plot twist.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Does trying to look professional in college summer job interviews count? *whistles nervously* :)

Expand full comment
Maggie's avatar

Hmmm, at any time did you drive a luxury car, snort cocaine, unironically tell someone "coffee is for closers", or mistreat Molly Ringwald?

Expand full comment
Youngy's avatar

I did it all Maggie except for mistreating Molly Ringwald. That was beyond the pale. I wouldnтАЩt even think of doing drugs these days but IтАЩm glad I had the experiences I had without ever getting arrested!

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Unironically???? *breathes a sigh of relief* Lack of opportunity saved me from trouble with Molly Ringwald. Oddly, she wasn't hanging out with undergraduate engineering majors. :) At the time, I thought that '83 Corolla was pretty sweet.

Expand full comment
Rodney P Proctor's avatar

Be sure Jared and Ivanka make your subpoena list.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Check my comments above. If you're convening your own people's court, keep a close eye on the ranch dressing. It can get ugly. :)

Expand full comment
Edward's avatar

And none of those words apply to TFG.

Expand full comment
David Court's avatar

Why was I not called to be on the jury? ЁЯдм

Expand full comment
Robert Jaffee's avatar

Only people relegated to an insane asylum, need apply. So thereтАЩs plenty of potential jurors in Congress that fit that bill....:)

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Herb's rec room (oops, I mean the courtroom) was only so big. Not to mention that the veggie plate (oops, Dr Oz called it a crudite platter) was only so big. :)

Expand full comment
David Court's avatar

And, of course, I was on this side of the pond....

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

It got a little rough with the accusations of double-dipping in the ranch dressing. I don't know how the federal courts manage, juries are difficult!

Expand full comment
David Court's avatar

Isn't that is what the balliff is for, food fights?

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

If they're not busy taking care of their dogs. Seriously, juries are hard! :)

Expand full comment
David Court's avatar

ЁЯСНЁЯН╗

Expand full comment
Tim Coffey's avatar

To describe Klayman as crackers is an understatement.

Expand full comment
GlenD's avatar

How about crumb-y, then?

Expand full comment
Bluchek Mark's avatar

Crackers (the food, not the people) would sue for defamation.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

After the great wheat thins vs saltines debate, we decided to go with a veggie tray. :)

Expand full comment
Stephanie Bamberger's avatar

Veggies or crudit├йs?

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

Depends if Dr. Oz is coming. I can always grab extra salsa and asparagus. :)

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I thought he was a stalwart protector of liberty. How was I to know?!?!?! (Yes, Im kidding... jeeze :) )

Expand full comment
Tim Coffey's avatar

I'd give money to know Klayman's definition of "freedom". My guess is it's got nothing to do with civil rights and individual liberty.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

I suspect it means "Klayman can do whatever he wants with no negative consequences."

Expand full comment
Tim Coffey's avatar

Yes, but I think "freedom" for these people means ridding themselves of people who don't conform to their way of thinking and speaking.

Expand full comment
Walternate ЁЯЗ║ЁЯЗжЁЯЗиЁЯЗжЁЯЗкЁЯЗ║ЁЯЗ╣ЁЯЗ╝ЁЯЗйЁЯЗ░ЁЯЗмЁЯЗ▒ЁЯЗ▓ЁЯЗ╜ЁЯЗ╡ЁЯЗж's avatar

"Freedom" isn't just about what MAGA can do, but also what others can't do. MAGA "freedom" requires the active suppression or subversion of things they don't like.

Expand full comment
Mike Lew's avatar

That, too. :)

Expand full comment