
[Watch āNot My Partyā every week on Snapchat.]
Tim Miller: Hero? Terrorist? Or just a stupid kid in a shit situation?
This is āNot My Party.ā Brought to you by The Bulwark.
Certain news stories make meā
Miller and Mugatu (over Mozartās Requiem): Feel like Iām taking crazy pills!
Miller: āand the Kyle Rittenhouse debacle is one of those stories.
Off-screen reporter: Did Kyle Rittenhouse act in fear of his own life and was that action reasonable?
Miller: It seems like the media lives in two different universes and both are detached from the reality of what happened in Kenosha.
Frankie the Frog: Stop laughing.
Miller: The right wants to make Rittenhouse a hero, a freedom fighter. Ann Coulter says she wants Rittenhouse for president. Heās been called aā
Random dude: Patriot.
Miller: āand also aā
Miller (with air quotes) and Dinesh DāSouza (very earnestly): Good Samaritan.
Miller: āand even aā
Jonna Spilbor: Little bit of an icon.
Miller: In their delusion, heās being wrongly persecuted by the woke state.
Kenosha County Assistant District Attorney Thomas Binger: When the defendant provokes the incident, he loses the right to self-defense.
Flute Cop (with a MAGA hat photoshopped on): Thatās not what happened.
Miller: In this narrative, Kyle is a righteous vigilante battling against the real enemy, Antifa, and the BLM looters who are roaming free.
Frank OāSullivan: The radical, anti-cop, Antifa anarchists.
Miller: Both Fox and GOP politicians had a common refrain: Rittenhouse was just doing what the government shouldāve done.
Greg Gutfeld: He did the right thing. He did what the government should have done.
J.D. Vance: If we donāt fight back against the lawlessness, if we donāt defend this young boy, it may very well be your baby boy that they come for.
Miller: Letās just take a moment to entertain this as a serious position rather than a performative tough-guy act. Is this really the society that these soft-handed soy boys want? One where a 17-year-old can self-deputize, marching through town with his gun drawn, making citizenās arrests if he doesnāt feel like the government is doing a good enough job? Thatās a path to chaos, not justice.
Principal Seymour Skinner: Thereās no justice like angry mob justice.
Miller: Now, we know the Fox hosts and Ivy League Republican politicians donāt want this type of society because (1) you canāt even imagine these rich assholes sending their own teenagers into a riot armed with a weaponā
Ronald āMacā McDonald: Guys, guys, guys, no guns. No guns.
Miller: āand (2) thereās no way we wouldāve seen this same hero narrative on Fox if the righteous teen had been black and heād self-deputized to the Mall on January 6th, killing two insurrectionists.
Dwight Schrute: Same story, different ending.
Miller: While the rightās fan-fiction paints Rittenhouse as some kind of icon, letās check in on the wacky world of the left.
Jason Johnson: Kyle Rittenhouse is the enemy.
Dr. Thaddeus āRustyā Venture: Oh, of course.
Miller: Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley called him a white supremacist domestic terrorist. Wonkette pegged him as a homicidal maniac. Thereās a mad rush to lock him up, due process be damned.
Chief Clancy Wiggum: Lock him up.
Gus from The Ref (Denis Leary): Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down.
Miller: Thatās just not what the facts of this case bear out. The moral of this story is different from what all of these political actors want it to be. For starters, thereās no evidence this kid is a white supremacist. If you actually care about stopping white supremacy, flippantly throwing that label around is kinda diluting your argument. Maybe focus on another trial happening right now, that of Ahmaud Arberyās killersā
Dionne Davenport in Clueless (Stacey Dash): Do you see the distinction?
Miller: āwhich is an actual example of a homicide tied to racial animus.
Protester: Why is this allowed out here? Why?
Miller: But when it comes to Rittenhouse, hereās the bottom line: Heās not a martyr. Or a hero. Or an evil enemy.
Heās an 18-year-old with underdeveloped frontal lobes who got in way over his head. He failed himself getting into that situation and our society failed him myriad ways before he landed there.
Failed by his parents, who shouldnāt have been tacitly supportive of his vigilantism. (Pssst, 17-year-olds shouldnāt have semiautomatic weapons at all, by the way.)
Failed by the assholes in Kenosha who created this ruckus, burning the black business district in the name of some kind of perverted justice.
Failed by the governor who shouldāve done a more timely job responding to the riots.
And failed by the cops, who encouraged this random teen marching around with a deadly weapon instead of sending him home.
Kenosha police officer: We appreciate you guys. We really do.
Miller: And after all those failures, what actually happened? A scared and stupid kid who thought he was defending the city where his dad lived killed a couple of equally stupid white rioters. We wouldāve been better off if all of them had been at home playing Grand Theft Auto instead.
See you next week for more āNot My Party.ā And let me know if you think this new haircut is a failure. I kinda like it.