I have no affection for Judge Judy. She is a horrible, angry, insensitive, self-righteous asshole. I literally cannot watch her show, and frankly, I don't understand how a person with any kind of compassion can countenance her behavior toward the people who prostrate themselves to her cruel show.
I have no affection for Judge Judy. She is a horrible, angry, insensitive, self-righteous asshole. I literally cannot watch her show, and frankly, I don't understand how a person with any kind of compassion can countenance her behavior toward the people who prostrate themselves to her cruel show.
I used to work in an infusion center where we would get state prisoners with guards for treatment and they were always watching court shows like JJ, Judge Mathis etc., Jerry Springer or Cops. I thought it was weird. Given the opportunity, wouldn't you want to be distracted by something with creative merit that could be uplifting or at least take you our of your own circumstances-- an escape for the mind?
For people dissatisfied with the injustice of this life, a fantasy version of justice might be how they seek escapism from their own circumstances.
When I was a newlywed, I lived in a city known for its unresponsive police. We came home one day to find our place had been burgled. The theft was no emergency. Whoever had done this was long gone. So I called the police, non-emergency. I couldn't get through. Feeling like a walk, anyhow, I walked to the local station to report the burglary. The police there laughed at me. What kind of ditz seeks out neighborhood police to report a theft these days?!
After they stopped laughing, they explained I should call 911, further tying up emergency response, though I wasn't having an emergency, to report the theft. So I did. A whole year later, I finally get follow-up from the police, but by then I had fresher troubles to manage.
I'm pretty privileged. If I don't get the consolation of timely justice over a theft that didn't hurt my standard of living much anyhow, I have plenty else to occupy my mind besides fantasies of justice. The indignity of being laughed at by police for trying to report a crime stung me at first, but soon faded. Others, though, with fewer consolations? Maybe fantasy justice is their escape from their own experience of injustice and indignity.
Perhaps. But then again, if you ask most of them, they are all innocent. Except the guy in the ED the other night. He came from Elmira and was a murderer-rapist (admitted). My husband and I were also robbed, they took our phone (before the time of cellphones) so we had to call the police from our neighbors apartment. They didn't laugh at us but they also never recovered anything.
Hey Midge...would like to get your take on something I've been thinking about lately, which doesn't have a direct relation to the subject at hand here but is at least tangential. And I want to be absolutely clear this isn't a criticism of any kind but rather an honest inquiry. Recently offered a polite explanation for a comment to someone who asked for it, and for whatever reason they took it as "blame", which it was in fact not. It all went south pretty quickly, and I'm not looking for a repeat of that kind of misunderstanding.
"I'm pretty privileged." I understand your meaning in light of your subject. I could say the same thing about myself. But here's what I've been wondering about lately...
The word privilege has been used far and wide of late with regard to race, so much so that it often seems to inherently carry a negative racial overtone or connotation regardless of the circumstance in which it's used. And I think this can be detrimental to a lot of conversations (though not this one particularly). Sometimes I think 'advantage' or 'advantaged' might be a better descriptor in some circumstances because it is more 'neutral' as far as current usage goes. Consider the following...
Privilege: a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group.
Advantage: a condition or circumstance that puts one in a favorable or superior position.
Privileges are more often 'granted' rather than 'earned'. Not as much when it comes to 'advantages', since many of them must be 'earned' in one way or another. The theft you spoke of didn't affect you much economically, which took some of the 'sting' out of it. In this case, I think this is a circumstance of advantage rather than privilege, since it could apply to folks of any race who find themselves in similar economic circumstances and with "plenty else to occupy [their minds]", while the word privilege has, by my lights anyway, come to commonly denote something quite different.
I hope you can see what I'm driving at, since I don't want to drive at it too hard or too long. I've just come to think that a lot of the heat in our public discourse about certain things is unintentionally (or, sadly, sometimes intentionally) generated unnecessarily by words that are correct in many ways, but because of the negative connotations they often garner would be better replaced with something more appropriate to the specific subject / circumstance. This may not actually lower the temperature overall any time soon but might just snuff out a fire or two on occasion. And if enough of those small blazes are extinguished, perhaps the larger ones will start to die down a bit as well, and the lower temp could be more conducive to better understanding by all concerned.
Again, I want to emphasize I'm not criticizing here but only speculating and looking for an opinion. What you wrote seemed a good opportunity to broach the subject with someone who is articulate and seems to care about language (noted your comment about Inferno), and I guess I just wanted to take advantage of that. (Sometimes certain plays on words are sort of unavoidable. Sorry.) So, if you have the time and inclination to throw something back at me, not about this one particular instance so much but about my larger reference to our public discourse, I'd much appreciate it. And if not, no harm, no foul. Will just say thanks for taking the time to read this.
I get where you're coming from. "Privilege" ends up being a contentious word, partly because it's treated as a marker of tribal identity in the culture wars, partly because it may insinuate that a "privilege" is somehow not earned. On the other hand, it's standard to call a driver's license a privilege, not a right, and it is earned: I don't think the case that "privilege" denotes what's unearned is particularly strong. Even so, when people want to distinguish between earned and unearned advantages, they may use "privilege" for the latter: having distinct words for distinct ideas is handy.
Depending on who I'm talking to, I might use "privilege" or "advantage" or even "blessing" to lower the temperature. Among Bulwark subscribers, I think "privilege" is OK. The Bulwark stakes out a space where being conservative means not having to be anti-"woke" all the time, where it's possible to engage the "woke" on their own terms, and "privilege" is now famous as a "woke" word.
On a personal note, I was lucky to be born with a body like mine into a well-educated, upper-middle-class family. I was born with a tissue defect that's physically easy to detect, but still often not tested for (I wasn't tested till my 30s, after I'd had kids), even with the best medical care. It's not terrible, at least not in my case, but it does tend to cause unexplained, uncomfortable weirdness at an early age. Which in turn may result in fun stuff like medical debt, wrongful institutionalization, painkiller dependency... That I got my degree, got out of medical debt, never got hooked on narcotics, eventually got a diagnosis, and now can at least fake it (most of the time) as a semi-respectable suburban mom is all pretty lucky. Sure, it took effort and tough choices, but it was definitely made easier by other unearned advantages I just lucked into. Under any definition of "privilege", "privilege" seems to describe the good luck in my life pretty well.
Well, thanks for getting back to me on this. And I think you're right in everything you said. Especially the relationship of the meaning of privilege as it relates to luck. I've been rather privileged in that way for a few reasons myself.
Semantics can be choppy waters to navigate sometimes. But while I'm by no means a language expert of any kind, I've always been interested in language and words and how they serve as the main medium for our communication with each other, and I often find the nuances of that communication of particular interest, and like to get perspectives from people that, because of their own life experiences, may see something I take to be correct about this subject differently from me.
You noted that you may choose different words to convey the same idea, depending upon whom you're talking to. I often do the same, in the interest of trying to make a point without generating any unnecessary and distracting heat, whether it involves posting a comment or speaking to someone IRL. There are a few other places where I post comments that I often write a bit differently than I do here for a couple of reasons, so your point about that is well taken.
Thanks again for your response. I find it quite useful in my thinking on this. BTW...interesting what you said about reading Inferno using a verso translation. Have never had that kind of experience, since my only language skills are of the English variety. I'm of Italian descent, my father being 1st generation from a large Italian family in Philly. He spoke and understood Italian, but never passed that skill on to me. Wasn't much call for it in the small central Kentucky town where I was born and raised, being as ours was the only Italian name in the phone book. Which not only covered the town but the whole county. ;-)
Well, I don't believe they would feel vicariously vindicated watching any of those shows. A friend of mine was recently at her father's bedside in an emergency dept. next to a rapist-murderer attended by 4 prison guards drawing their overtime paid by my NYS taxes. This guy kept talking to her and finally she said - "Buddy I am not your friend and frankly, you lost me at the rape and murder. I don't give a shit what has happened to you. Don't talk to me." However, he continued to try to talk to her and in particular stare at her. The prison guards did nothing. He got his surgical consult and an OR date and time the very next day. (Broken jaw d/t testifying against another rapist for a lesser sentence.. what can I say? snitches get stitches) but all paid for by us. I hope they break it again.
Vindication for what goes on in prison, or what sends the most violent offenders to prison? No. But aren't prisoners and prison guards also likely to come from populations where small-claims-sized wrongs are particularly frustrating?
A fantasy of ordinary life being a bit more just, a "no-nonsense" personality whose "tough talk" seems to firmly divide right from wrong and wise from foolish? It seems possible that those less insulated from social breakdown would appreciate this fantasy more. If it comes with lurid spectacle and schadenfreude, so much the more entertaining, I suppose.
LOL! That is exactly why audiences tune in--- they love watching her dish it out to people with whom they can't identify or empathize. The cruelty IS the point.
The "guests" volunteer for it--- to be degraded in public is worth the 15 minutes of "fame" they get in return. They will be replaying recordings of their appearance for family and friends for decades. They will be played at their funerals.
My daughter was on Judge Judy. She was in a dispute with a former friend/landlord and filed in small claims. She was invited to be on the show, and they coached her and set her up as "the good girl" and the landlord as "the bad girl." She won her case, and the show paid the small amount of funds she was rewarded.
I have no affection for Judge Judy. She is a horrible, angry, insensitive, self-righteous asshole. I literally cannot watch her show, and frankly, I don't understand how a person with any kind of compassion can countenance her behavior toward the people who prostrate themselves to her cruel show.
I used to work in an infusion center where we would get state prisoners with guards for treatment and they were always watching court shows like JJ, Judge Mathis etc., Jerry Springer or Cops. I thought it was weird. Given the opportunity, wouldn't you want to be distracted by something with creative merit that could be uplifting or at least take you our of your own circumstances-- an escape for the mind?
For people dissatisfied with the injustice of this life, a fantasy version of justice might be how they seek escapism from their own circumstances.
When I was a newlywed, I lived in a city known for its unresponsive police. We came home one day to find our place had been burgled. The theft was no emergency. Whoever had done this was long gone. So I called the police, non-emergency. I couldn't get through. Feeling like a walk, anyhow, I walked to the local station to report the burglary. The police there laughed at me. What kind of ditz seeks out neighborhood police to report a theft these days?!
After they stopped laughing, they explained I should call 911, further tying up emergency response, though I wasn't having an emergency, to report the theft. So I did. A whole year later, I finally get follow-up from the police, but by then I had fresher troubles to manage.
I'm pretty privileged. If I don't get the consolation of timely justice over a theft that didn't hurt my standard of living much anyhow, I have plenty else to occupy my mind besides fantasies of justice. The indignity of being laughed at by police for trying to report a crime stung me at first, but soon faded. Others, though, with fewer consolations? Maybe fantasy justice is their escape from their own experience of injustice and indignity.
Perhaps. But then again, if you ask most of them, they are all innocent. Except the guy in the ED the other night. He came from Elmira and was a murderer-rapist (admitted). My husband and I were also robbed, they took our phone (before the time of cellphones) so we had to call the police from our neighbors apartment. They didn't laugh at us but they also never recovered anything.
Hey Midge...would like to get your take on something I've been thinking about lately, which doesn't have a direct relation to the subject at hand here but is at least tangential. And I want to be absolutely clear this isn't a criticism of any kind but rather an honest inquiry. Recently offered a polite explanation for a comment to someone who asked for it, and for whatever reason they took it as "blame", which it was in fact not. It all went south pretty quickly, and I'm not looking for a repeat of that kind of misunderstanding.
"I'm pretty privileged." I understand your meaning in light of your subject. I could say the same thing about myself. But here's what I've been wondering about lately...
The word privilege has been used far and wide of late with regard to race, so much so that it often seems to inherently carry a negative racial overtone or connotation regardless of the circumstance in which it's used. And I think this can be detrimental to a lot of conversations (though not this one particularly). Sometimes I think 'advantage' or 'advantaged' might be a better descriptor in some circumstances because it is more 'neutral' as far as current usage goes. Consider the following...
Privilege: a special right, advantage, or immunity granted or available only to a particular person or group.
Advantage: a condition or circumstance that puts one in a favorable or superior position.
Privileges are more often 'granted' rather than 'earned'. Not as much when it comes to 'advantages', since many of them must be 'earned' in one way or another. The theft you spoke of didn't affect you much economically, which took some of the 'sting' out of it. In this case, I think this is a circumstance of advantage rather than privilege, since it could apply to folks of any race who find themselves in similar economic circumstances and with "plenty else to occupy [their minds]", while the word privilege has, by my lights anyway, come to commonly denote something quite different.
I hope you can see what I'm driving at, since I don't want to drive at it too hard or too long. I've just come to think that a lot of the heat in our public discourse about certain things is unintentionally (or, sadly, sometimes intentionally) generated unnecessarily by words that are correct in many ways, but because of the negative connotations they often garner would be better replaced with something more appropriate to the specific subject / circumstance. This may not actually lower the temperature overall any time soon but might just snuff out a fire or two on occasion. And if enough of those small blazes are extinguished, perhaps the larger ones will start to die down a bit as well, and the lower temp could be more conducive to better understanding by all concerned.
Again, I want to emphasize I'm not criticizing here but only speculating and looking for an opinion. What you wrote seemed a good opportunity to broach the subject with someone who is articulate and seems to care about language (noted your comment about Inferno), and I guess I just wanted to take advantage of that. (Sometimes certain plays on words are sort of unavoidable. Sorry.) So, if you have the time and inclination to throw something back at me, not about this one particular instance so much but about my larger reference to our public discourse, I'd much appreciate it. And if not, no harm, no foul. Will just say thanks for taking the time to read this.
I get where you're coming from. "Privilege" ends up being a contentious word, partly because it's treated as a marker of tribal identity in the culture wars, partly because it may insinuate that a "privilege" is somehow not earned. On the other hand, it's standard to call a driver's license a privilege, not a right, and it is earned: I don't think the case that "privilege" denotes what's unearned is particularly strong. Even so, when people want to distinguish between earned and unearned advantages, they may use "privilege" for the latter: having distinct words for distinct ideas is handy.
Depending on who I'm talking to, I might use "privilege" or "advantage" or even "blessing" to lower the temperature. Among Bulwark subscribers, I think "privilege" is OK. The Bulwark stakes out a space where being conservative means not having to be anti-"woke" all the time, where it's possible to engage the "woke" on their own terms, and "privilege" is now famous as a "woke" word.
On a personal note, I was lucky to be born with a body like mine into a well-educated, upper-middle-class family. I was born with a tissue defect that's physically easy to detect, but still often not tested for (I wasn't tested till my 30s, after I'd had kids), even with the best medical care. It's not terrible, at least not in my case, but it does tend to cause unexplained, uncomfortable weirdness at an early age. Which in turn may result in fun stuff like medical debt, wrongful institutionalization, painkiller dependency... That I got my degree, got out of medical debt, never got hooked on narcotics, eventually got a diagnosis, and now can at least fake it (most of the time) as a semi-respectable suburban mom is all pretty lucky. Sure, it took effort and tough choices, but it was definitely made easier by other unearned advantages I just lucked into. Under any definition of "privilege", "privilege" seems to describe the good luck in my life pretty well.
Well, thanks for getting back to me on this. And I think you're right in everything you said. Especially the relationship of the meaning of privilege as it relates to luck. I've been rather privileged in that way for a few reasons myself.
Semantics can be choppy waters to navigate sometimes. But while I'm by no means a language expert of any kind, I've always been interested in language and words and how they serve as the main medium for our communication with each other, and I often find the nuances of that communication of particular interest, and like to get perspectives from people that, because of their own life experiences, may see something I take to be correct about this subject differently from me.
You noted that you may choose different words to convey the same idea, depending upon whom you're talking to. I often do the same, in the interest of trying to make a point without generating any unnecessary and distracting heat, whether it involves posting a comment or speaking to someone IRL. There are a few other places where I post comments that I often write a bit differently than I do here for a couple of reasons, so your point about that is well taken.
Thanks again for your response. I find it quite useful in my thinking on this. BTW...interesting what you said about reading Inferno using a verso translation. Have never had that kind of experience, since my only language skills are of the English variety. I'm of Italian descent, my father being 1st generation from a large Italian family in Philly. He spoke and understood Italian, but never passed that skill on to me. Wasn't much call for it in the small central Kentucky town where I was born and raised, being as ours was the only Italian name in the phone book. Which not only covered the town but the whole county. ;-)
Well, I don't believe they would feel vicariously vindicated watching any of those shows. A friend of mine was recently at her father's bedside in an emergency dept. next to a rapist-murderer attended by 4 prison guards drawing their overtime paid by my NYS taxes. This guy kept talking to her and finally she said - "Buddy I am not your friend and frankly, you lost me at the rape and murder. I don't give a shit what has happened to you. Don't talk to me." However, he continued to try to talk to her and in particular stare at her. The prison guards did nothing. He got his surgical consult and an OR date and time the very next day. (Broken jaw d/t testifying against another rapist for a lesser sentence.. what can I say? snitches get stitches) but all paid for by us. I hope they break it again.
Vindication for what goes on in prison, or what sends the most violent offenders to prison? No. But aren't prisoners and prison guards also likely to come from populations where small-claims-sized wrongs are particularly frustrating?
A fantasy of ordinary life being a bit more just, a "no-nonsense" personality whose "tough talk" seems to firmly divide right from wrong and wise from foolish? It seems possible that those less insulated from social breakdown would appreciate this fantasy more. If it comes with lurid spectacle and schadenfreude, so much the more entertaining, I suppose.
LOL! That is exactly why audiences tune in--- they love watching her dish it out to people with whom they can't identify or empathize. The cruelty IS the point.
The "guests" volunteer for it--- to be degraded in public is worth the 15 minutes of "fame" they get in return. They will be replaying recordings of their appearance for family and friends for decades. They will be played at their funerals.
Yes - the cruelty is the point. Same with the treatment of "others" - immigrants, journalists, protestors, shithole countries, etc. in TrumpWorld.
My daughter was on Judge Judy. She was in a dispute with a former friend/landlord and filed in small claims. She was invited to be on the show, and they coached her and set her up as "the good girl" and the landlord as "the bad girl." She won her case, and the show paid the small amount of funds she was rewarded.
Oh, that's how it works. They find you and coach you. Of course.
I agree and like Jerry Springer, I don't understand the attraction. Yet it seems to be playing in every doctors office I go to.