I hear you, and if the three T-shirts were intending with their attire to be "those who wish to instill fear", they did so believing that instilled fear will keep you from challenging them on their attire's message. They do not worry about intellectual niceties such as, did you not react due to de-escalation or appeasement, if they even…
I hear you, and if the three T-shirts were intending with their attire to be "those who wish to instill fear", they did so believing that instilled fear will keep you from challenging them on their attire's message. They do not worry about intellectual niceties such as, did you not react due to de-escalation or appeasement, if they even know the words and their meanings.
They also believe that if they see you have noticed their "message" but do nothing, you have implicitly agreed and they have won. Bullies are like that. You could stand up to one with calm, low-key arguments, not fists. Of course, that only assumes that the "provocation" was worth it in your mind, but that is a different analysis, one that Jeffrey's wife espoused and which won the day with him.
Agreed. It’s an ongoing conundrum that we face over and over in varying intensities. “Silence is complicity”, versus giving them the attention they crave by challenging them. I usually think of the perfect response the next day, after examining the situation every which way.
I admired the way an old friend responded to a racist joke years ago; “I don’t think it’s true, and I don’t think it’s funny”. Simple. Succinct. Unfortunately, I don’t think fast on my feet.
You need to read Kahneman's Thinking Fast and Slow. Thinking fast is a habit, but habits are all to often ingrained biases. Develop good thinking habits, slowly, and your quick responses may -- that's may -- be appropriate. In my experience, far too many people with quick retorts are full of nonsense.
I hear you, and if the three T-shirts were intending with their attire to be "those who wish to instill fear", they did so believing that instilled fear will keep you from challenging them on their attire's message. They do not worry about intellectual niceties such as, did you not react due to de-escalation or appeasement, if they even know the words and their meanings.
They also believe that if they see you have noticed their "message" but do nothing, you have implicitly agreed and they have won. Bullies are like that. You could stand up to one with calm, low-key arguments, not fists. Of course, that only assumes that the "provocation" was worth it in your mind, but that is a different analysis, one that Jeffrey's wife espoused and which won the day with him.
Agreed. It’s an ongoing conundrum that we face over and over in varying intensities. “Silence is complicity”, versus giving them the attention they crave by challenging them. I usually think of the perfect response the next day, after examining the situation every which way.
I admired the way an old friend responded to a racist joke years ago; “I don’t think it’s true, and I don’t think it’s funny”. Simple. Succinct. Unfortunately, I don’t think fast on my feet.
You need to read Kahneman's Thinking Fast and Slow. Thinking fast is a habit, but habits are all to often ingrained biases. Develop good thinking habits, slowly, and your quick responses may -- that's may -- be appropriate. In my experience, far too many people with quick retorts are full of nonsense.
QED my above post.
Too violent. Just be nice and give him a ticket to an NFL locker room to participate in a tackling drill with his shirt super-glued to his body.